The Storm that Wasn't

The storm came and went. Nothing major happened here. My two standby generators were setup, connected to a Tripp-lite phase controller system that automatically switched power to standby batteries and then kicked on the Honda Genset. Two heavy-duty power conditioners are inline after that, which perfectly set the AC sinewave to 60 hz, 115 VAC. Two levels beneath the ground was my server room, cooled by well water pumped through a a radiator that chilled the ambient room temperature to 16 degrees. The computer rack holds 10 single unit servers with a 10 TB disk array housing an oracle server that holds every single episode of Three's Company. The Nissan GT-R was placed safely in the underground garage next to the 1967 MG. The guns and ammo were placed in the gun safe next to the false wall. For safety, all guns except the .22 are disassembled. It's bad enough to get shot, let alone by your own guns. I phoned the caterer and canceled my order from the previous day. (I had a dinner party organized for 100 complete with a mini wine-tasting ceremony.). *

* The entire article is complete bullshit except for the first two sentences.