Depression

 Dan Bell, a very well-respected and talented videographer and shooter, had a podcast where he admitted being depressed.

"It was like one day, the thought of even getting out of bed seemed impossible". 

And I never understood what he meant until these past few months. "Its like a dark cloud appeared and took over". And then in that moment I understood what he meant by that.

I tried to rationalize the fact I had picked up her ashes last week from the University hospital.

The tricky part about depression is, you can get yourself to a point where you're feeling good. And then bang, depression hits and you start back at zero.

A flashback. A memory. A voice. Feelings of comfort.

Rude shock.

My lack of content was a direct result of my depression. Only now do I see through the forest.