Goodbye Tinder, You useless fucking app

 

99.999999999% of my matches were a waste of time. I joined up last October, thinking I would secure at least a date. Nope. I'm fit, fairly good looking, but I'm in an age demographic that doesn't fit this app: 51.

The women swiping on me were overweight, old, and looked like they rolled out of bed without doing their hair. Some looked drunk. I'm sorry, but if you can't take care of yourself, how do you expect me to swipe right on you?

I read online that it takes 3,000 swipes to get an ass in your seat across from you. 

 

 

Believe that. I don't have time to grind through 3000 women a night - who does? I deleted my account and wished the company (Match Group and it's parent) would file Chapter 11 bankruptcy. I pray for that.

 

My dating experience is echoed by a multitude of users online. Women have an advantage on these apps. Men do not. There is no organic match matching on this app. If I lowered my standards, I could get laid tonight with any women who's obese, old, and quite frankly, not my type.

 

I'd rather wait. I don't care if you ghost me, that's all right. No fucks given here. Their loss. I just don't have the fucking time to grind through thousands of women every night. And not the good kind of grinding. 

 

I've started a Youtube channel and began learning how to edit my videos with Davinci Resolve 17. Very neat. Since I stopped using Cannabis 3+ weeks ago, my creativity has gone through the roof.

 

I'll find another app to use, but outside of  Match group's realm. Fuck that company, seriously. 

 

Plenty of Fish was also a nightmare. Thank God I was only on that platform for 5 days before I realized how fucked it was. No, I don't want to date grandma who's 59, fat, and obese. 

 

I work out 6 days a week. I have standards. And no, I don't want to be a sugar daddy, and I never pay for sex. Ever.

 

I've dumped half my clothes to goodwill, and will be buying more fancy clothes. A woman from work came back from Maternity leave recently. The first thing she said when she looked at me was "You look great!". And this woman was literally a 10. But married with kids. No-go.

 

It's great to receive compliments. I work hard to keep myself in shape. It's demoralizing to swipe through and sift daily. Fuck that. 

 

It'll take some time, I know I'll find someone nice eventually. Theresa would want me to do that. She told me so before she past away. I think of her every day. Her family? They can burn in hell.

 

I could punch a hole in my door without even feeling the pain. They better not ever approach, call, or visit.

 

God bless my friend Paul.