I Miss You Theresa

 

And when that path of loneliness and despair is chosen for you, the road never changes. When my beloved wife Theresa Molaison past away on September 9, 2019, my whole world shattered. She may have been tiny, but her voice carried. I was terrified of her wrath, that's for sure. But more terrified of making her cry. And we shared more of our tears between each other, that's for sure.

I remember going back to work, not even a week off and expected to behave normally in the office. Back then, I wanted to die in that room. Just like she did during that sad hospital room moment. On the phone with my so-called 'mother', who enjoyed asking "Are you sure she's dead???" joyfully as she fought back the laughter. "Check again to see if she's still breathing" she asked me. 

That's how vile and callous she was. I never received a phone call of condolence from my brother, sister-in-law, nephew or niece. When I met Theresa back in 1999 January, at Cowboy's of all places. It was a wild country bar in Calgary. I loved country music, and there were girls there. 

Back then it was on 10th avenue in Calgary. I remember the moment very clearly. The prettiest girl I had ever seen was at the bar. And I asked her to dance with me. I gave her my card, and told her she was a very nice dancer. I asked what she did for a living, and said she was a nurse. I was in love. She called me the next day and we went on a date (!!). We hit it off.

The hell we both been through is not something I feel comfortable talking about. Let's just say it was awful for both of us, due to our family situations. Theresa has a fierce loyalty and honesty I always admired. And when we stopped having sex 3 years, it was due to her failing health. I never cheated and never even held the hand of another woman. And yet people kept lunging at me. I kept dodging - I respected and loved Theresa that much.

It's a mystery to me why people cheat. If you love someone, why wouldn't you be faithful? I never understood it. The thought of Theresa on the couch crying was enough to set me straight. I never needed threats of violence or breakup. Theresa said it like it was, she never sugar-coated anything at all. That's what I loved about her. She was and is my one true soul mate. I will never forget her, and I wished I wouldn't. 

The fact I have kitty in an expensive hotel is tantamount to how well she taught me to care for animals we loved. I feel like as a civilization, we have advanced in technology but back-tracked on being decent to one another. That common caring and thoughtfulness has been removed with a very cold exterior.

 Quite frankly, we live in a society where it's easier to follow a stranger Twitter instead of texting someone you know. And what a sad time that is to live through.

God knows she's in a better place now. Thank goodness for that. 

Chris